I am FINALLY starting to feel better. It's crappy when you feel so crappy and sad. I really don't like it. I like glitter and unicorns and hearts and flowers. Oh and rainbows. I love rainbows. And sometimes when things aren't magically delicious, YOU have to make them magically delicious yourself. (Please, someone... get the Lucky Charms reference!) So I am trying. And not too bad of an effort today, I must say.
Breakfast. It's what's for dinner. How can anything bring you down after that? :) If something does, then you haven't experienced OUR breakfast for dinner. It's magically delicious! Chocolate chip pancakes with all the bells and whistles - you know, the spray redi-whip on top! Bacon. Bacon. Oh, and more bacon. Fried on the stove. :) I didn't say it was the healthiest of dinners... I only said it was magically delicious. We all needed a dinner like that tonight after this past week.
And we needed time as a family today. It was an amazingly beautiful spring Sunday here in VA... perfect for a Sunday drive (yes, we must be getting old... we love our Sunday drives!) and a mountain hike. We saw 4 deer, 3 big birds, 2 turtles (no, just kidding...no turtles, but I was feeling the song...) and a lizard that the kids wanted to take home. (That would be a big NO!) I would never have attempted a drive or a hike like this without my husband. We have not been very successful at Vicki's after school walks as of late. With all of the odd behaviors and refusals... the last thing I wanted to do was get stuck 2 miles into the woods with Vicki deciding to drop on the ground and not go any further. Thankfully, though, that didn't happen! She seemed ready for today too.
Let me tell you about some of my glitter moments today, some of my magically delicious rainbows... holding hands with my son in a beautiful mountain forest just listening to the silence. No screaming or yelling or fighting. Just our feet rustling through the leaves, and occasionally tripping over a rock or a root. :) .... giggling uncontrollably with Ally tonight at bedtime... for no particular reason. I think it was just to giggle. And giggling with your 7 year old who just lost her other front tooth and now has a toothless grin... it's the best. :) OK, and now a magically delicious moment with Vicki... just watching her plop down on a tree stump seat during our hike and laughing when Daddy opened up a carbonated water and it sprayed all over everyone. I saw moments of my Vicki today. My Vicki with the dancing eyes. My Vicki with the dazzling smile.
Maybe I am just adjusting to all of the recent (hopefully VERY temporary) changes. Maybe it's because I get to call and schedule all of the appointments tomorrow that the neurologist wanted us to have. Maybe it's because I have talked endlessly with our behaviorist and Vicki's teachers and Vicki's therapists and aides... and I feel a little more armed for battle against those dragons. And Vicki seemed a little better today. Yes, a lot of the same behaviors and yelling and crying and challenges were still there. But I felt a little stronger today, a little bit more confident. Just a little. But even just a little bit is good.
And when we were on our mountain hike today, I saw another family. A mom and dad and sister and brother. And the mom and dad were holding the young boy's hands. And he was struggling with something. And I could feel their pain. But I could also feel their hope. They were out there just like we were today, enjoying this day, this day the Lord made... and we were glad and rejoicing.
Everyone. Everyone has a story. I just read a story in the paper about a young boy who had autism, who was about a year older than my Vicki. Who got out of his house and wandered into an area of water. And God wanted him back. This is not my story to tell or to write. But this story made me think. It made me pray. It made me fearful. It made me grateful. Even though we are struggling with things right now, it will all be ok. I know it will. I have my beautiful Vicki. I kissed her goodnight tonight and she smiled at me. That's pretty magically delicious.
I couldn't believe it, you took my heart
I couldn't retrieve it, said to myself
What's it all about
Now I know there can be no doubt
You can do magic
You can have anything that you desire
I hope that your day is filled with the magic that you make of it. xoxo
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