Money. Money. Money. Money.
Tax day. Tax day. Tax day. Tax day.
Blah. Blah. Blah. Blah.
Getting things done ahead of time. Now that's a novel idea. Why can't I be that person? It's not like tax day jumped out from around a shadowy corner and said, ' ah ha. gotcha! Didn't see me coming, did ya?' What is it about an approaching deadline that catapults me into suddenly being productive? What the hell was I doing with my time before? I was busy, I wasn't just sitting around. Honestly. It baffles me really. So, yes, I have numbers and money on the mind tonight.
Money and autism. Autism and money. It sucks. It really sucks.
Wouldn't it be great if we could just go back to bartering for services? I'll rub your back (yes... in a previous life it seems, I once was a physical therapist...) if you talk to my daughter (getting some speech therapy services.) Everybody deals with financial strain; It's a topic of too many conversations that you never want to be having. Everybody worries about money. Making it, spending it, saving it.
I don't want tonight's post to be a whine fest, but, well, maybe a wine fest... after all, we finally hit submit on our taxes. :) Yes, I worry that I will never be able to go back to work because of Vicki's needs. Vicki can't go to a day care. Vicki needs me to take her to and from school. I need to be available for those texts and calls from school when something goes wrong. I need to be there for her, I want to be there for her. I need to go to this meeting or that meeting to talk about Vicki's progress and goals. I need to call this doctor, make an appointment for that doctor. Get this medicine filled that's not covered by insurance. Donate to that autism organization because I want their research to directly benefit my daughter. What about Vicki's future? What about my future? What about our future? What can I do to ease the burden of financial strain? Why is it that the amount of money we can afford or can't afford to spend on therapies and medicines and doctors makes me feel guilty - for spending it, for not spending it. What if money were no object? How much more could we have helped Vicki? Whine fest done. Wine fest commencing. :)
Enough about that. No wait. I have one more thing to say... Guess how much it costs to smile down at my daughter and look into her eyes? Guess how much it costs to spend that extra 10 minutes with her to allow her to slowly go through her day by reciting her visual pictures? Guess how much it costs to get goosebumps when I hear Vicki say, 'I love you Mommy'? Guess how much it costs to hear her recite The Lord's Prayer? Guess how much it costs to watch Joey hold Vicki's hand and dance with her? Guess how much it costs to watch Ally grab Vicki's hand and skip down the hall together? Guess how much it costs to hear Vicki sneeze and then hear her immediately say, 'Bless you' ? Guess how much it costs to see Vicki ride on daddy's shoulders and giggle because she has to duck to get through the doorway? Well, it cost me a box of tissues and it gave me everything I've ever wanted. I feel like I've won the lottery already. (And on that note, I'm off to bed... and it's not even midnight!)
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Day 16. Year 2.
I've been thinking a lot lately about how lucky I am and how lucky Vicki is to have so many wonderful, truly exceptional people in our lives that love and support us through it all. What's that saying.... 'When life hands you lemons, make lemonade.' Well, I have to say, sometimes the lemons really make me pucker and say ewww... But, you know what? So many people step up to support you when you really don't think you can stand up by yourself. And so many people are there ready to give you a cup of sugar to make your lemonade sweeter. :) Well, it was 90 degrees today... there's something about a tall glass of lemonade over ice that really hits the spot!
But seriously, though... I feel so blessed. I've often thought how lucky I am, that God chose me to be Vicki's mom. I learn so much from Vicki. All of my kids teach me things everyday... but with Vicki, I've learned to appreciate and celebrate every victory, no matter how big or small it may seem. I love seeing the world through Vicki's eyes... the simple pleasures, the little things. I often think about how 'children with autism' have difficulty with emotions. Yes, Vicki struggles with her emotions. But so do I,and so does everyone, it's just different. I can assure you though that Vicki can feel emotions, I can only imagine the depth of what she feels. As much as I love seeing the world through Vick's eyes, I hate seeing the pain and the confusion too... I can't imagine what she is feeling or going through. Sometimes when I am trying to explain something to Ally about Vicki, I get all choked up. Because I really just don't know. I really have no idea. I really can't explain.
Anyway... I don't want to paint a picture that is all rainbows and unicorns. There are days, and there have been many days in this past month, where things really suck. And I have a little pity party for myself, myself... how selfish of me. Oh my gosh, it's so hard... I'm having a bad day. I feel so frustrated. I'm overwhelmed. I don't know how much more I can take. Whaa, whaa, whaa... feel bad for me. But, you know what I've been thinking about so much lately? All of those people who are helping myself and Vicki make lemonade. All of those people who choose to be in the trenches with us. Who choose to give Vicki everything they have and more. The teachers who choose to work with Vicki day in and day out, year in and year out to give Vicki every opportunity she deserves. It's not the money that keeps them coming back everyday. The amazing girls I've hired over the years to come into our home and give everything of themselves to Vicki. The girls who see us at our worst and most vulnerable. And the girls who come back day after day, year after year because they love Vicki. They know the feeling you get when Vicki gets something, the goosebumps that appear when Vicki says your name unprompted. They share with Vicki every moment. The good moments, the bad moments, the exceptional, unforgettable moments. I always worry that someday, after a particularly bad set of moments, that they will forget the good moments and not want to come back. But they always do. And I owe them everything. Every person that has come in and touched our lives, and has given so much of themselves to us. Every person who has just been there to listen. Every person, including you.
Today was full of lots of bad moments, lots of 'no's', lots of struggles. But it was also filled with good moments, spontaneous moments, goosebumps in a good way moments. Let me leave you tonight with a little story of a good moment. I don't know how often I've mentioned Vicki's love, her stuffed animal that she has become really attached to over the past couple of years. Every child has that one special blanket, or that one special stuffed animal, or that one special toy that is their security blanket. For me when I was young it was a little baby doll that I called 'me me'. I still have her. :) And Vicki has 'Layse black cat'. Layse was the name of our beloved doggie we had in the family for 13.5 years who we had to put to sleep this past October. I love that Vicki calls her stuffed animal 'Layse black cat'. Although I can't really figure out if it's a dog, a cat, or a bear. All I know is that Vicki loves it. :) And Vicki takes it with her when she goes for rides in the car. Today Vicki had horseback riding and then she went to the store with one of the girls who comes in and works with Vicki... Anyway, I didn't realize until bedtime, when we gathered our stuff up to go to bed (yes Ally has 'Glitter' her doggie in a pink tutu, and Joey has 'Willow Breeze' his big Bengal tiger... shhhhh NO one is too old for a stuffed animal!) that 'Layse black cat' was not on the couch with Vicki and when we told her to get Layse, she couldn't find her. And like any child who loves their special security blanket, Vicki was not happy when she couldn't find her. Any child would be upset and shed a few tears, maybe more. But with Vicki, it was a bit more. She kept repeating 'Layse black cat. Layse black cat. Layse black cat'. I texted the girl that had taken Vicki today just to see if LayseLayse black cat that she's never been without her, until tonight. It could have been a very long night. A very long night. But, after she realized that Layse black cat was in her car, I didn't have to tell her how much Vicki was upset. She just knew. And without me asking, she jumped in her car and drove back up to our house at 9:30 tonight about 30 miles round trip, just so she could place Layse black cat back in Vicki's arms. Now that is some sweet lemonade. xoxo
But seriously, though... I feel so blessed. I've often thought how lucky I am, that God chose me to be Vicki's mom. I learn so much from Vicki. All of my kids teach me things everyday... but with Vicki, I've learned to appreciate and celebrate every victory, no matter how big or small it may seem. I love seeing the world through Vicki's eyes... the simple pleasures, the little things. I often think about how 'children with autism' have difficulty with emotions. Yes, Vicki struggles with her emotions. But so do I,and so does everyone, it's just different. I can assure you though that Vicki can feel emotions, I can only imagine the depth of what she feels. As much as I love seeing the world through Vick's eyes, I hate seeing the pain and the confusion too... I can't imagine what she is feeling or going through. Sometimes when I am trying to explain something to Ally about Vicki, I get all choked up. Because I really just don't know. I really have no idea. I really can't explain.
Anyway... I don't want to paint a picture that is all rainbows and unicorns. There are days, and there have been many days in this past month, where things really suck. And I have a little pity party for myself, myself... how selfish of me. Oh my gosh, it's so hard... I'm having a bad day. I feel so frustrated. I'm overwhelmed. I don't know how much more I can take. Whaa, whaa, whaa... feel bad for me. But, you know what I've been thinking about so much lately? All of those people who are helping myself and Vicki make lemonade. All of those people who choose to be in the trenches with us. Who choose to give Vicki everything they have and more. The teachers who choose to work with Vicki day in and day out, year in and year out to give Vicki every opportunity she deserves. It's not the money that keeps them coming back everyday. The amazing girls I've hired over the years to come into our home and give everything of themselves to Vicki. The girls who see us at our worst and most vulnerable. And the girls who come back day after day, year after year because they love Vicki. They know the feeling you get when Vicki gets something, the goosebumps that appear when Vicki says your name unprompted. They share with Vicki every moment. The good moments, the bad moments, the exceptional, unforgettable moments. I always worry that someday, after a particularly bad set of moments, that they will forget the good moments and not want to come back. But they always do. And I owe them everything. Every person that has come in and touched our lives, and has given so much of themselves to us. Every person who has just been there to listen. Every person, including you.
Today was full of lots of bad moments, lots of 'no's', lots of struggles. But it was also filled with good moments, spontaneous moments, goosebumps in a good way moments. Let me leave you tonight with a little story of a good moment. I don't know how often I've mentioned Vicki's love, her stuffed animal that she has become really attached to over the past couple of years. Every child has that one special blanket, or that one special stuffed animal, or that one special toy that is their security blanket. For me when I was young it was a little baby doll that I called 'me me'. I still have her. :) And Vicki has 'Layse black cat'. Layse was the name of our beloved doggie we had in the family for 13.5 years who we had to put to sleep this past October. I love that Vicki calls her stuffed animal 'Layse black cat'. Although I can't really figure out if it's a dog, a cat, or a bear. All I know is that Vicki loves it. :) And Vicki takes it with her when she goes for rides in the car. Today Vicki had horseback riding and then she went to the store with one of the girls who comes in and works with Vicki... Anyway, I didn't realize until bedtime, when we gathered our stuff up to go to bed (yes Ally has 'Glitter' her doggie in a pink tutu, and Joey has 'Willow Breeze' his big Bengal tiger... shhhhh NO one is too old for a stuffed animal!) that 'Layse black cat' was not on the couch with Vicki and when we told her to get Layse, she couldn't find her. And like any child who loves their special security blanket, Vicki was not happy when she couldn't find her. Any child would be upset and shed a few tears, maybe more. But with Vicki, it was a bit more. She kept repeating 'Layse black cat. Layse black cat. Layse black cat'. I texted the girl that had taken Vicki today just to see if LayseLayse black cat that she's never been without her, until tonight. It could have been a very long night. A very long night. But, after she realized that Layse black cat was in her car, I didn't have to tell her how much Vicki was upset. She just knew. And without me asking, she jumped in her car and drove back up to our house at 9:30 tonight about 30 miles round trip, just so she could place Layse black cat back in Vicki's arms. Now that is some sweet lemonade. xoxo
Monday, April 16, 2012
Day 15. Year 2.
I am shocked. I don't have anything to say. That usually never happens.
Maybe it's the post-vacation, pre-mail sorting and laundry and all the other crap that piles up blues. Why is it that I always feel more exhausted and way more stressed after a vacation? Maybe it's because for a few days I just push all that stress and crap aside and fill my head and heart with great ocean breezes and family memories...that when the vacation is over, I open the flood gates and everything comes rushing at me in full force again. I guess you can't stop those things that need to get done that you try to put off because you just don't want to do it. Ignoring things and procrastinating can only last up until the very last minute. :) As I sit here tonight reflecting on what this coming week brings, I just wanna procrastinate a little more. Some things I just don't want to tackle. I don't want to talk about stuff that's going on with Vicki. (Kinda ironic, huh? Considering I'm writing a 30 day blog about it... oh, and that reminds me, 15 days down, 15 to go...I really hope you are enjoying this blog. I don't know what you've taken from it, and if it's just something to help you procrastinate on your own to-do lists... well, then, that works for me! ha, ha...)
Seriously though, I get so frustrated and tired sometimes... and all I feel like I do is talk, talk, talk....Talk about the same stuff. Talk about the same behaviors. Talk about the same goals. I feel so often that all I do is talk. And I never do anything. I get so frustrated. All I want to do is help Vicki. And all I ever feel like I do is talk about helping Vicki. Talk about her behaviors. Talk about what the function of her behaviors might be. Is she doing it for attention? for escape? to get something tangible? or is it self-stimulating? Why is Vicki doing ......? How can I ramp up my reinforcement? Is it biomedically related? Is it hormonally related? Should I blame this on her being a pre-teen? Is she just having a bad day, a bad month?
Of course we all struggle with helping our children (and ourselves) every single day. That's part of our job as parents. To be a detective. To read between the lines and figure out what is going on even when our child doesn't tell us. Right? Use that magical mommy radar that goes off when we know something just isn't right with our child. And then figure out creative ways to help them through it. It's tough. Maybe it's taking the time to listen to what our child isn't even saying. And maybe it's time to spend that time just sitting in the dark rubbing their head and not saying a word. Maybe it's just being there.
I put a lot of stock in words and communicating. It's easy to say, 'well, just tell me how you feel'.... But what if they can't? Then what? How do we look for the clues we need to find to solve the mystery? And now, because it's Sunday night, and my mind is all over the place, and I don't even know what I just wrote, but talking about clues and mysteries... I now can't stop singing in my head, so I figured I might as well put it out there, so you won't be able to get it out of your head either. You're welcome! :)
You know we got a mystery to solve,
So Scooby Doo be ready for your act. Don't hold back!
And Scooby Doo if you come through
you're going to have yourself a scooby snack!
That's a fact!
Scooby-Dooby-Doo, here Are You.
You're ready and you're willing.
If we can count on you Scooby Doo,
I know you'll catch that villain.
So I guess there will always be mysteries to solve. And there will always be villains. And, if we are lucky we will solve the mysteries one at a time... Ruh roh.... Watch out week, I'm coming after you!! :)
Maybe it's the post-vacation, pre-mail sorting and laundry and all the other crap that piles up blues. Why is it that I always feel more exhausted and way more stressed after a vacation? Maybe it's because for a few days I just push all that stress and crap aside and fill my head and heart with great ocean breezes and family memories...that when the vacation is over, I open the flood gates and everything comes rushing at me in full force again. I guess you can't stop those things that need to get done that you try to put off because you just don't want to do it. Ignoring things and procrastinating can only last up until the very last minute. :) As I sit here tonight reflecting on what this coming week brings, I just wanna procrastinate a little more. Some things I just don't want to tackle. I don't want to talk about stuff that's going on with Vicki. (Kinda ironic, huh? Considering I'm writing a 30 day blog about it... oh, and that reminds me, 15 days down, 15 to go...I really hope you are enjoying this blog. I don't know what you've taken from it, and if it's just something to help you procrastinate on your own to-do lists... well, then, that works for me! ha, ha...)
Seriously though, I get so frustrated and tired sometimes... and all I feel like I do is talk, talk, talk....Talk about the same stuff. Talk about the same behaviors. Talk about the same goals. I feel so often that all I do is talk. And I never do anything. I get so frustrated. All I want to do is help Vicki. And all I ever feel like I do is talk about helping Vicki. Talk about her behaviors. Talk about what the function of her behaviors might be. Is she doing it for attention? for escape? to get something tangible? or is it self-stimulating? Why is Vicki doing ......? How can I ramp up my reinforcement? Is it biomedically related? Is it hormonally related? Should I blame this on her being a pre-teen? Is she just having a bad day, a bad month?
Of course we all struggle with helping our children (and ourselves) every single day. That's part of our job as parents. To be a detective. To read between the lines and figure out what is going on even when our child doesn't tell us. Right? Use that magical mommy radar that goes off when we know something just isn't right with our child. And then figure out creative ways to help them through it. It's tough. Maybe it's taking the time to listen to what our child isn't even saying. And maybe it's time to spend that time just sitting in the dark rubbing their head and not saying a word. Maybe it's just being there.
I put a lot of stock in words and communicating. It's easy to say, 'well, just tell me how you feel'.... But what if they can't? Then what? How do we look for the clues we need to find to solve the mystery? And now, because it's Sunday night, and my mind is all over the place, and I don't even know what I just wrote, but talking about clues and mysteries... I now can't stop singing in my head, so I figured I might as well put it out there, so you won't be able to get it out of your head either. You're welcome! :)
You know we got a mystery to solve,
So Scooby Doo be ready for your act. Don't hold back!
And Scooby Doo if you come through
you're going to have yourself a scooby snack!
That's a fact!
Scooby-Dooby-Doo, here Are You.
You're ready and you're willing.
If we can count on you Scooby Doo,
I know you'll catch that villain.
So I guess there will always be mysteries to solve. And there will always be villains. And, if we are lucky we will solve the mysteries one at a time... Ruh roh.... Watch out week, I'm coming after you!! :)
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Day 14. Year 2.
What a day! What a day! A happy, happy 7th birthday to my baby girl Ally. Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday dear Allyson, Happy Birthday to you! The day started bright and early watching a beautiful sunrise. I took the birthday girl and Joey out to the beach early this morning for one last seashell expedition. Vicki wanted to stay in bed. And so did Daddy. (Vicki, in general, doesn't sleep very much, but she sure does enjoy her snuggling under the blankets in the morning time. Joey, Ally, and I had a really nice time at the beach. And I feel a so guilty sometimes... when I have the passing thoughts of 'oh... this is so easy. This is so carefree.' :( I love it when my whole little family does stuff together. But, once in a while, I get a glimpse of how easy is it, and I feel so so guilty for thinking that.
Anyway... we got a few surprises again with our shells. :) In case you followed my blog last year, do you remember Bob and Larry, our big salt water hermit crabs we found in our shells last spring break? Well, they are still going strong! And now they have some new friends. We found a big 'eye' looking shell, who we named Vlad (a.k.a. Mike Wizowski, the eyeball). And Jerome and Libby. Oh, and Snot the slug. They met Bob and Larry when we got home tonight. The verdict is still out as to whether they will become fast friends or fast foes.
When we got back to the hotel room, we finally coaxed Vicki out of bed. Vicki did surprisingly well with leaving the hotel room. Of course it helped that we went out for a very fun brunch. A buffet breakfast. Yummy! And Vicki was quite happy with that. We really have to be careful with buffets with Vicki... but doesn't everyone have to be careful at buffets? :) Because Vicki wants a little bit of everything, and then wants a little bit of everything again. It was cute, there was a booth full of older ladies next to us and one of them came up to Vicki and told her how pretty she looked in her purple dress. And Vicki looked up at her and said thank you, unprompted. Awww..... love it. Then, of course, little pink birthday princess whispered to me, 'but mommy, I have a pink dress on, why doesn't she like mine?'
We had a minor meltdown, well, it would have been major if daddy wasn't with us... But on Vicki's schedule, we put a picture of 'row, row, row your boat' and Vicki has loved boat rides and canoeing in the past, but today as we were walking to the docks, she kept saying, 'no boat. no boat. no boat.' And I was walking with her and she plopped herself down , close to the side of the road and I couldn't get her to stand up. It scares me. Anyway, between daddy and the boat sightseeing company we made it. The company was amazing with Vicki; they were so accommodating and so nice. They let my husband take her on the boat first before everyone else boarded so she could get used to it. Have I said how amazing my husband is with Vicki? He got her to sit in the boat, and, yippi, we got the front 2 rows! Vicki plugged her ears for a while in the beginning and kept her head down, but by the time we were going full speed on the Atlantic, she was loving it. She looked so beautiful with her braids whipping in the wind and her dress blowing behind her as she would throw her head back and smile. So beautiful. I love having that snapshot of her etched in my mind. My husband would hold her arms out straight and she would stand up and stretch forward, it was like the Titanic scene. Vicki was having so much fun she kept trying to sit on the front of the boat as it was going fast. (Arghhhh.... my nerves!) And the boat crew announced Ally's name on the loudspeaker and we sang Happy Birthday. Best of all, we got to see at least 20 or so dolphins on this boat cruise. I was very impressed that all 3 kids lasted the full hour and a half!
So I just have to say how much I love little moments with the kids that make my heart swell. We stopped at a Chuck E Cheese for Ally's birthday dinner. It was not as painful as trips to Chuck E. Cheese usually are, surprisingly. I know I said this before, but I swear Vicki just wants to fight lately, such a pre-teen! She kept saying, 'dinner. dinner. dinner. yes! dinner. ' So we set a timer for her in the van and she settled down and said, 'first timer. then dinner.' Anyway, we got to Chuck E. Cheese and she didn't want to get out of the van. More of the stutter stop stepping. So, back to my heart swelling moment. Since it was Ally's birthday both Joey and Vicki gave Ally all of their tickets from their game tokens. Awww.... :) (And may I just make an observation here... the person who thought of the ticket thing at Chuck E. Cheese = brilliant. It's like the tickets are gold bars. The kids get so excited as the tickets come out of the machines... And, seriously, 100 tickets for a rubber frog? And they take hours and hours to pick out the perfect pieces of junk. It's like they are buying a new house or a new car.) Anyway, Joey and Vicki gave Ally their tickets for her birthday and then Ally decided that she would use some of her tickets for a toy for Joey and Vicki. :) But I did feel bad, Vicki was having a rough time at the end and Ally took a long time picking out the perfect sensory toy for Vicki and Vicki whined when Ally gave it to her. She kept saying no and pushed it away. (I think Vicki wanted a giant lollipop.) Ally looked sad. :( But she got over it quickly.
No one likes the end of an amazing vacation. Especially Vicki. It is heartbreaking. She is very good with directions and as soon as she recognizes that we are headed home, she starts, 'No home. No home. No, no home. Trip. Hotel. Yes! No home. No home.' And then she wails, 'No home please.' I feel the same way Vicki.
Anyway... we got a few surprises again with our shells. :) In case you followed my blog last year, do you remember Bob and Larry, our big salt water hermit crabs we found in our shells last spring break? Well, they are still going strong! And now they have some new friends. We found a big 'eye' looking shell, who we named Vlad (a.k.a. Mike Wizowski, the eyeball). And Jerome and Libby. Oh, and Snot the slug. They met Bob and Larry when we got home tonight. The verdict is still out as to whether they will become fast friends or fast foes.
When we got back to the hotel room, we finally coaxed Vicki out of bed. Vicki did surprisingly well with leaving the hotel room. Of course it helped that we went out for a very fun brunch. A buffet breakfast. Yummy! And Vicki was quite happy with that. We really have to be careful with buffets with Vicki... but doesn't everyone have to be careful at buffets? :) Because Vicki wants a little bit of everything, and then wants a little bit of everything again. It was cute, there was a booth full of older ladies next to us and one of them came up to Vicki and told her how pretty she looked in her purple dress. And Vicki looked up at her and said thank you, unprompted. Awww..... love it. Then, of course, little pink birthday princess whispered to me, 'but mommy, I have a pink dress on, why doesn't she like mine?'
We had a minor meltdown, well, it would have been major if daddy wasn't with us... But on Vicki's schedule, we put a picture of 'row, row, row your boat' and Vicki has loved boat rides and canoeing in the past, but today as we were walking to the docks, she kept saying, 'no boat. no boat. no boat.' And I was walking with her and she plopped herself down , close to the side of the road and I couldn't get her to stand up. It scares me. Anyway, between daddy and the boat sightseeing company we made it. The company was amazing with Vicki; they were so accommodating and so nice. They let my husband take her on the boat first before everyone else boarded so she could get used to it. Have I said how amazing my husband is with Vicki? He got her to sit in the boat, and, yippi, we got the front 2 rows! Vicki plugged her ears for a while in the beginning and kept her head down, but by the time we were going full speed on the Atlantic, she was loving it. She looked so beautiful with her braids whipping in the wind and her dress blowing behind her as she would throw her head back and smile. So beautiful. I love having that snapshot of her etched in my mind. My husband would hold her arms out straight and she would stand up and stretch forward, it was like the Titanic scene. Vicki was having so much fun she kept trying to sit on the front of the boat as it was going fast. (Arghhhh.... my nerves!) And the boat crew announced Ally's name on the loudspeaker and we sang Happy Birthday. Best of all, we got to see at least 20 or so dolphins on this boat cruise. I was very impressed that all 3 kids lasted the full hour and a half!
So I just have to say how much I love little moments with the kids that make my heart swell. We stopped at a Chuck E Cheese for Ally's birthday dinner. It was not as painful as trips to Chuck E. Cheese usually are, surprisingly. I know I said this before, but I swear Vicki just wants to fight lately, such a pre-teen! She kept saying, 'dinner. dinner. dinner. yes! dinner. ' So we set a timer for her in the van and she settled down and said, 'first timer. then dinner.' Anyway, we got to Chuck E. Cheese and she didn't want to get out of the van. More of the stutter stop stepping. So, back to my heart swelling moment. Since it was Ally's birthday both Joey and Vicki gave Ally all of their tickets from their game tokens. Awww.... :) (And may I just make an observation here... the person who thought of the ticket thing at Chuck E. Cheese = brilliant. It's like the tickets are gold bars. The kids get so excited as the tickets come out of the machines... And, seriously, 100 tickets for a rubber frog? And they take hours and hours to pick out the perfect pieces of junk. It's like they are buying a new house or a new car.) Anyway, Joey and Vicki gave Ally their tickets for her birthday and then Ally decided that she would use some of her tickets for a toy for Joey and Vicki. :) But I did feel bad, Vicki was having a rough time at the end and Ally took a long time picking out the perfect sensory toy for Vicki and Vicki whined when Ally gave it to her. She kept saying no and pushed it away. (I think Vicki wanted a giant lollipop.) Ally looked sad. :( But she got over it quickly.
No one likes the end of an amazing vacation. Especially Vicki. It is heartbreaking. She is very good with directions and as soon as she recognizes that we are headed home, she starts, 'No home. No home. No, no home. Trip. Hotel. Yes! No home. No home.' And then she wails, 'No home please.' I feel the same way Vicki.
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Day 13. Year 2.
Another beautiful day at the beach! I was so happy when Vicki went to put on her swimsuit this morning and she lifted her legs herself without me having to tap each of her legs, no hesitation at all. Oh... the little things that make my heart swell. :) I thought, wow, if this is any indication of how today will go, I will take it! But, alas, the excitement was short lived. We were getting ready to go out the door and it was a lot warmed outside today; the kids didn't need their sweatshirts, just swimsuits and a t-shirt. But, of course, Vicki wanted a repeat of yesterday, and yesterday she wore her purple sweatshirt. Now, you may think, 'why not just let her wear her purple sweatshirt? It would save time and a battle.' Yes, it would. And it's only a sweatshirt. But, we picked our battle. :( And the purple sweatshirt vs the blue t-shirt was it. I wasn't up for a fight. I really just wanted to get out the door and go down to the beach. But, sometimes, even the smallest of things, no matter how silly it seems to fight over, is worth the fight. Maybe not today, but some days, especially when the weather goes from 35 degrees to 85 degrees in the span of one or two days (which seems to be the norm this spring!) it is a battle that needs to be fought. So my husband stayed with Vicki and I took Joey and Ally down to the beach. I hate splitting up like that, but was more than happy not to be fighting this battle myself.
No more than 5 minutes later I see my husband and Vicki holding hands coming down the beach, skipping... Vicki skipping, not my husband. :) And there was Vicki with her blue t-shirt over her head, kind of. Halfway over her head, but it was on, and it was not the purple sweatshirt. It was warm enough that a minute later the t-shirts came off and that was fine. My husband said that all Vicki wanted was a fight. And when he didn't give her the fight, she got mad, got up, put the t-shirt halfway on and was out the door with him. :) Phew.
Yesterday, I had written a few more paragraphs that somehow disappeared between the time I hit save now and publish post. I guess I didn't really need them, but I'm going to write about the content again anyway. This trip to the beach has to be one of the least stressful and most 'relaxing' trip we've ever taken with the kids. 'Relaxing' in so far as a parent can relax around a child near the water or in a pool. Joey and Ally actually played together, or at least beside each other, without too much arguing. :) The water wasn't super warm, so no one wanted to be out deep for too long (plus there were a lot of jellyfish, ick!). And when my husband is around we give Vicki a little more freedom because my husband is speedy and I am not. :) And Vicki was really good. Sometimes I am so afraid of what 'could happen' (especially based on past experiences and Vicki's unpredictable nature) that I am afraid to let anything happen. So it was nice to see that Vicki would run down to the water, splashing all the way with her ponytail waving, sit down in the shallow waves and let the water carry her in, and get up run back and do it all over again. And when Joey and Ally were digging, Vicki came over and sat beside them mushing her hands in the wet sand and smiling and laughing. I always feel so much less stressed out when my husband is right there with us. In case I don't say this enough, he is amazing with Vicki and all the kids, and I am so grateful for him, everyday.
So, even though it was Friday the 13th, all in all, it was an amazing day. Vicki had her whiny moments, but then again so did I, and so did Ally, and so did Joey. We were a bit more prepared for some of the stuff. Oh there were some sit down on the ground yucky moments, but, again, with my husband there, we were able to get over it and move on. We met a lovely older woman on the beach today who lives here, her name was Myrtle. She gave all of the seashells she had found this morning to Ally. Ally was so excited! And Myrtle invited us over to her house the next street over so we could see her collections of beachy stuff anytime we wanted. :) What else happened... Oh, my perseverance paid off. I found Joey a black shark tooth after scooping up shell handfuls for quite some time!! Woo hoo! A bird pooped on my head. Seriously. Everyone got a good laugh over that. Really?!?! I was NOT laughing. What else. Oh, Joey took me into a toy store because he wanted my opinion on a candy jar he wanted to buy with his allowance. I should have realized... he never wants my opinion like that. A wooden box that has a slide lid. Yep, and a fake rubber rat comes out when you start sliding the lid. Very funny Joey. :) And yes, my husband and Ally were peeking their heads around the corner to watch the expression on my face. One of the highlights of our non-beach time was that at the Fudgeary, there was an awesome employee who sang while he was making the fudge. The kids loved it. And he was an amazing singer. So I whispered to him that it is Ally's birthday tomorrow and asked if he would do a special request. He serenaded Ally with a beautiful rendition of Happy Birthday. I wish I would have had my video camera on, it was priceless. Ally was beaming. What's better than as many free fudge samples as you want while being serenaded in front of a crowd of people that gathered to listen and then clap afterwards? It was tailor made for Ally. :) Gosh I love this beach air and atmosphere. And although I do have my computer with me, it's not on when the kids are awake. And it's kinda freeing... to just be there, in the moment with your kids, and not have everything else bog you down. I don't want spring break to end....
No more than 5 minutes later I see my husband and Vicki holding hands coming down the beach, skipping... Vicki skipping, not my husband. :) And there was Vicki with her blue t-shirt over her head, kind of. Halfway over her head, but it was on, and it was not the purple sweatshirt. It was warm enough that a minute later the t-shirts came off and that was fine. My husband said that all Vicki wanted was a fight. And when he didn't give her the fight, she got mad, got up, put the t-shirt halfway on and was out the door with him. :) Phew.
Yesterday, I had written a few more paragraphs that somehow disappeared between the time I hit save now and publish post. I guess I didn't really need them, but I'm going to write about the content again anyway. This trip to the beach has to be one of the least stressful and most 'relaxing' trip we've ever taken with the kids. 'Relaxing' in so far as a parent can relax around a child near the water or in a pool. Joey and Ally actually played together, or at least beside each other, without too much arguing. :) The water wasn't super warm, so no one wanted to be out deep for too long (plus there were a lot of jellyfish, ick!). And when my husband is around we give Vicki a little more freedom because my husband is speedy and I am not. :) And Vicki was really good. Sometimes I am so afraid of what 'could happen' (especially based on past experiences and Vicki's unpredictable nature) that I am afraid to let anything happen. So it was nice to see that Vicki would run down to the water, splashing all the way with her ponytail waving, sit down in the shallow waves and let the water carry her in, and get up run back and do it all over again. And when Joey and Ally were digging, Vicki came over and sat beside them mushing her hands in the wet sand and smiling and laughing. I always feel so much less stressed out when my husband is right there with us. In case I don't say this enough, he is amazing with Vicki and all the kids, and I am so grateful for him, everyday.
So, even though it was Friday the 13th, all in all, it was an amazing day. Vicki had her whiny moments, but then again so did I, and so did Ally, and so did Joey. We were a bit more prepared for some of the stuff. Oh there were some sit down on the ground yucky moments, but, again, with my husband there, we were able to get over it and move on. We met a lovely older woman on the beach today who lives here, her name was Myrtle. She gave all of the seashells she had found this morning to Ally. Ally was so excited! And Myrtle invited us over to her house the next street over so we could see her collections of beachy stuff anytime we wanted. :) What else happened... Oh, my perseverance paid off. I found Joey a black shark tooth after scooping up shell handfuls for quite some time!! Woo hoo! A bird pooped on my head. Seriously. Everyone got a good laugh over that. Really?!?! I was NOT laughing. What else. Oh, Joey took me into a toy store because he wanted my opinion on a candy jar he wanted to buy with his allowance. I should have realized... he never wants my opinion like that. A wooden box that has a slide lid. Yep, and a fake rubber rat comes out when you start sliding the lid. Very funny Joey. :) And yes, my husband and Ally were peeking their heads around the corner to watch the expression on my face. One of the highlights of our non-beach time was that at the Fudgeary, there was an awesome employee who sang while he was making the fudge. The kids loved it. And he was an amazing singer. So I whispered to him that it is Ally's birthday tomorrow and asked if he would do a special request. He serenaded Ally with a beautiful rendition of Happy Birthday. I wish I would have had my video camera on, it was priceless. Ally was beaming. What's better than as many free fudge samples as you want while being serenaded in front of a crowd of people that gathered to listen and then clap afterwards? It was tailor made for Ally. :) Gosh I love this beach air and atmosphere. And although I do have my computer with me, it's not on when the kids are awake. And it's kinda freeing... to just be there, in the moment with your kids, and not have everything else bog you down. I don't want spring break to end....
Friday, April 13, 2012
Day 12. Year 2.
How is it that sun, sand, surf, oh... and 3 kids, can make one so very tired? Phew. But tired in a good sun-drenched kind of way. :) Although the weather didn't go above 70 today, that did not stop the kids from enjoying everything they wanted to do! First up... lazy river. Whoever named it the lazy river must not have had kids with them at the time. :) Then, you know kids...they don't stay in one place for very long; plus, it was chilly so you had to keep moving to stay warm. So it went something like this today: lazy river. pool. hot tub. pool. hot tub. pool. hot tub. pool. water slide. pool. hot tub. water slide. water slide. water slide. water slide. pool. hot tub. pool. hot tub. pool. beach. sand. water. sand. sand. seashell collecting. sand. trench digging. water. sand. sand. seashell collecting. more digging. rinse off in ocean. time to go in. sand. sand. rinse off again in ocean. sand. squirrel (just checking if you were still reading this! plus we just watched 'Up' the other day...) where was I. oh. rinse off again in ocean. finally leave beach. rinse off in outdoor shower. take 20 minutes for the kids to actually stand together and smile for a picture by a palm tree. hotel. shower. super late lunch. lunch. shower. bath. lunch. car. outdoor shopping area. dinner. hotel. movie. bed. yippee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well, goodnight. Jk!! You know something else I discovered today? I really hate being the adult sometimes. And cleaning up after playing at the beach is almost as icky as cleaning up after playing in the snow. I'm not complaining, oh wait, yes I am. :)
I would love to say that today was all sunshine and blue skies. Well, it was. But it wasn't. I suppose that if all 3 of my children behaved 100% of the time all the time, I would have nothing to write about or complain about, or yell about. So, there are things that happen with each on of my children throughout the day that don't go perfectly as planned. Probably about 100 or so things. Same with you? But the thing is, when it happens with Joey or Ally, it may be significant at the time, or irritating, or whatever, but it is usually does not make or break our whole family's day. (Well, I don't know... Ally is definitely acting like a pre-teen at the age of 6!) But lets look at some of the things that happened with her today. Well, poor thing... this morning she looked like a little bird flying into a window pane over and over again. It was hard not to laugh, so I did. :p But I did feel bad. Ally thought the balcony door was open and walked right into it, face first. Then less than 5 minutes later she tripped over the threshold and got a bump on her leg which my husband then iced for 20 minutes much to Ally's dismay. Joey, well, oh... this was cool... he saw a pod of dolphins in the ocean from our balcony. So that was fun. He mopes, yes, even at the beach. He doesn't pay attention to things- except of course, the pod of dolphins he spotted. I have to call his name 20 times before he hears me. And, what kid showers and then when I go in to the bathroom and ask him what soap he used because the wrapper is still on the one in the shower, he says, oh... I forgot to use soap. That would be Joey. But even though these things affect our day, they don't make or break an activity for the most part.
I will count today as being a win - in the plus column for our family- and a loss in autism's column. That's how I feel like a lot. Was the day a net gain or a net loss? It's Daddy, Mommy, Joey, Vicki and Ally verse Autism. So today, in large part, thanks to Daddy, I will call it a win for us. :) Heck, the 5 of us are together today enjoying some great memories at the beach. Just being able to share a smile and the gift of a day should be enough to put us in the win column, right?
Like I said, my husband can get Vicki to do a heck of a lot more than I can get her to do. And, quite frankly, it irritates the crap out of me. Autism or not, why is it that when Daddy says something, it works, when Mommy says the same thing, the kids laugh. Really? So annoying! And so grateful at the same time! Vicki loves the beach and everything associated with it. But even with the ocean sprawled out in front of her this morning, she didn't want to get her swimsuit on. It took about 30 minutes to get her to do it. And it was even on her visual schedule. Blah. I've noticed something the last few weeks, sometimes it's like Vicki's in slow motion. Super slow motion, or even like she is frozen in a spot. I know I've said that she has been hesitating a lot more lately, like she is trying to decide whether she should do something or not. But this morning, when she was standing getting ready to put her swimsuit on, I had to actually tap her legs for her to lift them up. It was odd. And she was doing that stutter step thing a lot too... like she would move forward, but lean back at the same time and push back into us.
Anyway, there are always lots of little things that happen, but they stayed little for the most part because Daddy was with us. But while we were out at the outdoor shopping tonight walking around, Vicki got really mad. It was about something very minuscule at the time, but turned into a full blown tantrum. I would not have been able to get Vicki to walk back to the car if I was by myself with her. It was kind of a crappy ending to a pretty good day. But we made sure to not hurry Joey or Ally who were enjoying watching 3 tigers at a refuge display. It's hard not to let a tantrum win for me sometimes... I just want to get it over with. But that does nothing for anyone and it ends up scoring a point in autism's column. So we waited it out, enjoyed the tigers and made our way slowly back to the car.
One thing that makes me nervous is that Vicki internalizes a schedule so quickly that when we do something spontaneous, it has already become routine in Vicki's eyes. For example... last night I made the kids hot cocoa and popped some popcorn. Tonight Vicki wanted it again. And I didn't have it. (But it was kinda cool... she said 'coffee cup' because that's what she drank the cocoa out of last night... and she must not have remembered 'cocoa' so she said 'coffee cup' Yay Vicki!!!) So, I'm a bit nervous that tomorrow she is going to want an exact repeat of today. We'll cross that bridge when we get to it tomorrow though!
Geeze... sorry I wrote a lot. Guess I like having this time at the beach, enjoying the sound of the ocean in the background as I type... Which reminded me of something I was thinking about today. I, myself, love finding seashells; and it's one of the things I love most about the beach. I love being right out there in the water, right where there is a little shelf of sand, and each time the waves pound the sand and the tide rolls in and out, I love the feeling of each new wave. Each new wave brings with it all the hope to find that perfect shell- unique and colorful and amazing. And when you grasp it as it's rolling back out to sea, you feel that moment of 'ahhhh.... yes. got 'ch!' I feel like I hit the seashell jackpot with my 3 gems. They are each perfect to me- so unique and colorful and amazing. And even though my 3 shells may come out of the ocean of life a bit sandy and dirty at times... just a quick rinse off and they are just as beautiful as ever. I am full of silly metaphors lately. But, gosh, I hope you all get that feeling of 'ahhhh. yes!' when you look at your seashells. Goodnight. xoxo Looking forward to another beautiful sunrise tomorrow!
I would love to say that today was all sunshine and blue skies. Well, it was. But it wasn't. I suppose that if all 3 of my children behaved 100% of the time all the time, I would have nothing to write about or complain about, or yell about. So, there are things that happen with each on of my children throughout the day that don't go perfectly as planned. Probably about 100 or so things. Same with you? But the thing is, when it happens with Joey or Ally, it may be significant at the time, or irritating, or whatever, but it is usually does not make or break our whole family's day. (Well, I don't know... Ally is definitely acting like a pre-teen at the age of 6!) But lets look at some of the things that happened with her today. Well, poor thing... this morning she looked like a little bird flying into a window pane over and over again. It was hard not to laugh, so I did. :p But I did feel bad. Ally thought the balcony door was open and walked right into it, face first. Then less than 5 minutes later she tripped over the threshold and got a bump on her leg which my husband then iced for 20 minutes much to Ally's dismay. Joey, well, oh... this was cool... he saw a pod of dolphins in the ocean from our balcony. So that was fun. He mopes, yes, even at the beach. He doesn't pay attention to things- except of course, the pod of dolphins he spotted. I have to call his name 20 times before he hears me. And, what kid showers and then when I go in to the bathroom and ask him what soap he used because the wrapper is still on the one in the shower, he says, oh... I forgot to use soap. That would be Joey. But even though these things affect our day, they don't make or break an activity for the most part.
I will count today as being a win - in the plus column for our family- and a loss in autism's column. That's how I feel like a lot. Was the day a net gain or a net loss? It's Daddy, Mommy, Joey, Vicki and Ally verse Autism. So today, in large part, thanks to Daddy, I will call it a win for us. :) Heck, the 5 of us are together today enjoying some great memories at the beach. Just being able to share a smile and the gift of a day should be enough to put us in the win column, right?
Like I said, my husband can get Vicki to do a heck of a lot more than I can get her to do. And, quite frankly, it irritates the crap out of me. Autism or not, why is it that when Daddy says something, it works, when Mommy says the same thing, the kids laugh. Really? So annoying! And so grateful at the same time! Vicki loves the beach and everything associated with it. But even with the ocean sprawled out in front of her this morning, she didn't want to get her swimsuit on. It took about 30 minutes to get her to do it. And it was even on her visual schedule. Blah. I've noticed something the last few weeks, sometimes it's like Vicki's in slow motion. Super slow motion, or even like she is frozen in a spot. I know I've said that she has been hesitating a lot more lately, like she is trying to decide whether she should do something or not. But this morning, when she was standing getting ready to put her swimsuit on, I had to actually tap her legs for her to lift them up. It was odd. And she was doing that stutter step thing a lot too... like she would move forward, but lean back at the same time and push back into us.
Anyway, there are always lots of little things that happen, but they stayed little for the most part because Daddy was with us. But while we were out at the outdoor shopping tonight walking around, Vicki got really mad. It was about something very minuscule at the time, but turned into a full blown tantrum. I would not have been able to get Vicki to walk back to the car if I was by myself with her. It was kind of a crappy ending to a pretty good day. But we made sure to not hurry Joey or Ally who were enjoying watching 3 tigers at a refuge display. It's hard not to let a tantrum win for me sometimes... I just want to get it over with. But that does nothing for anyone and it ends up scoring a point in autism's column. So we waited it out, enjoyed the tigers and made our way slowly back to the car.
One thing that makes me nervous is that Vicki internalizes a schedule so quickly that when we do something spontaneous, it has already become routine in Vicki's eyes. For example... last night I made the kids hot cocoa and popped some popcorn. Tonight Vicki wanted it again. And I didn't have it. (But it was kinda cool... she said 'coffee cup' because that's what she drank the cocoa out of last night... and she must not have remembered 'cocoa' so she said 'coffee cup' Yay Vicki!!!) So, I'm a bit nervous that tomorrow she is going to want an exact repeat of today. We'll cross that bridge when we get to it tomorrow though!
Geeze... sorry I wrote a lot. Guess I like having this time at the beach, enjoying the sound of the ocean in the background as I type... Which reminded me of something I was thinking about today. I, myself, love finding seashells; and it's one of the things I love most about the beach. I love being right out there in the water, right where there is a little shelf of sand, and each time the waves pound the sand and the tide rolls in and out, I love the feeling of each new wave. Each new wave brings with it all the hope to find that perfect shell- unique and colorful and amazing. And when you grasp it as it's rolling back out to sea, you feel that moment of 'ahhhh.... yes. got 'ch!' I feel like I hit the seashell jackpot with my 3 gems. They are each perfect to me- so unique and colorful and amazing. And even though my 3 shells may come out of the ocean of life a bit sandy and dirty at times... just a quick rinse off and they are just as beautiful as ever. I am full of silly metaphors lately. But, gosh, I hope you all get that feeling of 'ahhhh. yes!' when you look at your seashells. Goodnight. xoxo Looking forward to another beautiful sunrise tomorrow!
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Day 11. Year 2.
A much, much, much, much, much needed day. :) Hooray for spring break-ation! I was running around at 6 am freaking out about just getting home last night, doing laundry, and repacking for the beach... but it was all worth it in the end! As long as the kids can deal with frantic, crabby, whirlwind mommy... at some point, like, right this minute with the kids in bed, as I am sitting on the balcony looking over the Atlantic... yep... my mouth hurts, I think I cracked a smile. :) Maybe I should wake the kids up to see that mommy actually can smile, occasionally.
I love people. I want people. I need people. I can't live without people. But sometimes, it's so nice to have just my neat and tidy little family of 5 in the car with the windows cracked, and no other people around. Sometimes that's when I am the freest. . (That word looks like it is spelled wrong, but my spell checker did not highlight it. Hmmm....) Anyway, it was a beautiful day for a drive. And I knew it was going to be a good day because Vicki got to sleep in and when I got her up, I showed her her schedule and she did a little knee slap jump up and down excited dance. :) And she only asked for her favorite song 'Dancing in the Moonlight' one time in the car and when we told her 'later' she didn't mind at all. It wasn't 'Dancing in the Moonlight, yes, Dancing in the Moonlight, yes, Dancing in the Moonlight, yes, You have to wait, Dancing in the Moonlight, yes'. You get the picture, right? But today Vicki was so happy to just be in the car and ride and ride and ride. She held onto her new little Barbie she got in her Easter basket last night for most of the trip. The only bad thing was that I had to keep looking back at her because there was a little bunny that Barbie held and yellow bunny ears that Barbie wore, and she kept trying to put them in her mouth. We did have a little moment when she dropped the bunny ears on the floor and couldn't find them, but she got over it pretty well. I was very proud of her.
I love watching all of my kids faces when they see the ocean for the first time in the distance. Their eyes dance, they start bouncing up and down in their seats, and they actually look up from their books or activities to look outside. :) Oh, I had a minor freak out... I am not a fan of bridges at all. And instead of taking the main road with the big bridge, we took a smaller side road that had a draw bridge... it scared the crap out of me... The bridge actually swivled open and then closed... The kids loved it. Me, not so much. :) But it was cool that Margaritaville was on the radio while we were crossing over the bridge to the beach.
There was no screaming or crying or not wanting to get out of the car today. :) Vicki jumped right out and was very excited to get in the elevator. We used to have trouble staying in hotels because some corridores in hotels look a lot like doctor office complexes. But she definately knows what the trip picture and the beach picture mean on her visual schedule. No doctor on the agenda today! We got to our room and the first thing Vicki did was go to the balcony, which, yet again, I am a freak about. I keep thinking she will look over the balcony and drop her glasses. :) Anyway, she pulled up a chair and parked herself on the balcony overlooking the ocean. She could have stayed there all night. I am such a big believer in the power and magic of the ocean breeze. And the power and magic of sand to exfoliate and make my feet soft. :) Anyway... I was a little nervous that Vicki wouldn't come in from the balcony. We wanted to go down to the ocean for a closer look and she did a little scream or two, and lots of people looked up from down below. She finally came in and at first didn't want to put her swimsuit on, which was so odd, Vicki loves everything about the beach. But once she was willing, she got that excited dance going full force again. :)
I have to share one of the most exciting things that happened on our beach walk this evening. Ally is my seashell girl. Joey is my digger, explorer man. And Vicki loves, loves, loves the water. Brrr.... it's a bit too chilly for my liking today! And my husband, bless his soul, holds Vicki's hand and steers her. :) Well, all of the kids tonight were enjoying writing things in the wet sand. Ally wrote her name and drew lots of hearts. Joey wrote 'Joey is awesome'. And Vicki wrote the entire alphabet. Then she did the coolest thing. And she did this without any prompting at all. She wrote, 'Ally Joey Dad Mom' in that order. Then in front of 'Ally' she wrote going from right to left, 'i-k-c-i-V which of course ended up spelling 'Vicki' and she did it starting at the i to get the spacing completely right so her name was in front of Ally's. It was amazing. (And I have to say, it took me about 2 minutes just now to spell Vicki backwards.) We were all very impressed. We almost had a little incident because Vicki wanted to go to the pool after our walk, but we were all getting pretty chilly. I must admit there was a little bribing involved with say, hot cocoa and pie. It worked. :)
What a difference a day makes! I can't wait for the sunrise in the morning!!!! Our adventure awaits us! Maybe I'll go searchin' for my lost shaker of salt. salt. salt. salt. :)
I love people. I want people. I need people. I can't live without people. But sometimes, it's so nice to have just my neat and tidy little family of 5 in the car with the windows cracked, and no other people around. Sometimes that's when I am the freest. . (That word looks like it is spelled wrong, but my spell checker did not highlight it. Hmmm....) Anyway, it was a beautiful day for a drive. And I knew it was going to be a good day because Vicki got to sleep in and when I got her up, I showed her her schedule and she did a little knee slap jump up and down excited dance. :) And she only asked for her favorite song 'Dancing in the Moonlight' one time in the car and when we told her 'later' she didn't mind at all. It wasn't 'Dancing in the Moonlight, yes, Dancing in the Moonlight, yes, Dancing in the Moonlight, yes, You have to wait, Dancing in the Moonlight, yes'. You get the picture, right? But today Vicki was so happy to just be in the car and ride and ride and ride. She held onto her new little Barbie she got in her Easter basket last night for most of the trip. The only bad thing was that I had to keep looking back at her because there was a little bunny that Barbie held and yellow bunny ears that Barbie wore, and she kept trying to put them in her mouth. We did have a little moment when she dropped the bunny ears on the floor and couldn't find them, but she got over it pretty well. I was very proud of her.
I love watching all of my kids faces when they see the ocean for the first time in the distance. Their eyes dance, they start bouncing up and down in their seats, and they actually look up from their books or activities to look outside. :) Oh, I had a minor freak out... I am not a fan of bridges at all. And instead of taking the main road with the big bridge, we took a smaller side road that had a draw bridge... it scared the crap out of me... The bridge actually swivled open and then closed... The kids loved it. Me, not so much. :) But it was cool that Margaritaville was on the radio while we were crossing over the bridge to the beach.
There was no screaming or crying or not wanting to get out of the car today. :) Vicki jumped right out and was very excited to get in the elevator. We used to have trouble staying in hotels because some corridores in hotels look a lot like doctor office complexes. But she definately knows what the trip picture and the beach picture mean on her visual schedule. No doctor on the agenda today! We got to our room and the first thing Vicki did was go to the balcony, which, yet again, I am a freak about. I keep thinking she will look over the balcony and drop her glasses. :) Anyway, she pulled up a chair and parked herself on the balcony overlooking the ocean. She could have stayed there all night. I am such a big believer in the power and magic of the ocean breeze. And the power and magic of sand to exfoliate and make my feet soft. :) Anyway... I was a little nervous that Vicki wouldn't come in from the balcony. We wanted to go down to the ocean for a closer look and she did a little scream or two, and lots of people looked up from down below. She finally came in and at first didn't want to put her swimsuit on, which was so odd, Vicki loves everything about the beach. But once she was willing, she got that excited dance going full force again. :)
I have to share one of the most exciting things that happened on our beach walk this evening. Ally is my seashell girl. Joey is my digger, explorer man. And Vicki loves, loves, loves the water. Brrr.... it's a bit too chilly for my liking today! And my husband, bless his soul, holds Vicki's hand and steers her. :) Well, all of the kids tonight were enjoying writing things in the wet sand. Ally wrote her name and drew lots of hearts. Joey wrote 'Joey is awesome'. And Vicki wrote the entire alphabet. Then she did the coolest thing. And she did this without any prompting at all. She wrote, 'Ally Joey Dad Mom' in that order. Then in front of 'Ally' she wrote going from right to left, 'i-k-c-i-V which of course ended up spelling 'Vicki' and she did it starting at the i to get the spacing completely right so her name was in front of Ally's. It was amazing. (And I have to say, it took me about 2 minutes just now to spell Vicki backwards.) We were all very impressed. We almost had a little incident because Vicki wanted to go to the pool after our walk, but we were all getting pretty chilly. I must admit there was a little bribing involved with say, hot cocoa and pie. It worked. :)
What a difference a day makes! I can't wait for the sunrise in the morning!!!! Our adventure awaits us! Maybe I'll go searchin' for my lost shaker of salt. salt. salt. salt. :)
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